Just how much can one miss another?
Is there ever a limit?
Just how much can one love another?
Can love surpass destiny?
Can love transcend boundaries?
Can love disregards absence?
I know faith in Allah will strengthen a fallen one.
I know belief in Allah will heal a broken one.
And I know my trust in Allah will bring me to a departed one.
One day.
We will meet again.
May Allah permit...
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Of nights and thunderstorms
La, at night times like this, when the rain falls and a thunderstorm strikes, I can't help but think of you.
I can't help but wonder if the rain seeps through the soil, reaches you and cools you... I can't help but wonder if you are wet... I wonder if you welcome the coolness of the rain water drenching your body...
La, I wonder how you are. I wonder of your state there in the soil. Has nature been kind to you? Has it slowly begun its breaking down process? Are you still you?
So many thoughts go through my mind.
Yet all lead to just one thought - I hope God has kept you well and that you are resting in peace...
I love you, La.
Words can't describe how much I miss you. Right up to this day...
I can't help but wonder if the rain seeps through the soil, reaches you and cools you... I can't help but wonder if you are wet... I wonder if you welcome the coolness of the rain water drenching your body...
La, I wonder how you are. I wonder of your state there in the soil. Has nature been kind to you? Has it slowly begun its breaking down process? Are you still you?
So many thoughts go through my mind.
Yet all lead to just one thought - I hope God has kept you well and that you are resting in peace...
I love you, La.
Words can't describe how much I miss you. Right up to this day...
Thursday, April 10, 2008
A year older no longer
La, it was your birthday, La.
8 April.
It was 080408 this year. A nice number pattern, don't you think, La?
But this date has no meaning to you anymore...
La, do you know that the birth of you had an impact on many people's lives?
Without you born, Abah & Mak wouldn't have had their firstborn - a gift from God that is most anticipated by all married couples wishing to start a family.
Without you born, Atuk & Nenek wouldn't have had their first female grandchild.
Without you born, I wouldn't have had a sister.
Without you born, there would have been no Irfan and Ikhwan - the sunshine of our lives.
Without you born, hundreds of people wouldn't be doing whatever they are doing now where ever they are because their encounter, interactions and/or friendship with you formed a part of their lives and no matter how minor that part is, it has altered their lives in one way or another.
As it turns out, every birth has an impact on the whole universe, and so did yours.
La, 'til today, the accessories that I gave you on your birthday last year still remain unused. You liked them a lot because they were in black and gold. You'd wanted to wear them for Raya, maybe not the danglies. But you never had the chance to wear them.
I shall keep them in pristine condition, La. So that every year, on the day that I used to celebrate with you, I can look back in retrospect upon the last birthday gift that I had ever given my one and only sister.
I love you, La. I miss you.
Do accept my gift to you - a prayer filled with love and smeared with tears...
8 April.
It was 080408 this year. A nice number pattern, don't you think, La?
But this date has no meaning to you anymore...
La, do you know that the birth of you had an impact on many people's lives?
Without you born, Abah & Mak wouldn't have had their firstborn - a gift from God that is most anticipated by all married couples wishing to start a family.
Without you born, Atuk & Nenek wouldn't have had their first female grandchild.
Without you born, I wouldn't have had a sister.
Without you born, there would have been no Irfan and Ikhwan - the sunshine of our lives.
Without you born, hundreds of people wouldn't be doing whatever they are doing now where ever they are because their encounter, interactions and/or friendship with you formed a part of their lives and no matter how minor that part is, it has altered their lives in one way or another.
As it turns out, every birth has an impact on the whole universe, and so did yours.
La, 'til today, the accessories that I gave you on your birthday last year still remain unused. You liked them a lot because they were in black and gold. You'd wanted to wear them for Raya, maybe not the danglies. But you never had the chance to wear them.
I shall keep them in pristine condition, La. So that every year, on the day that I used to celebrate with you, I can look back in retrospect upon the last birthday gift that I had ever given my one and only sister.
I love you, La. I miss you.
Do accept my gift to you - a prayer filled with love and smeared with tears...
Friday, April 4, 2008
Irfan had a high fever
La, Irfan sakit for a few days. Whenever he gets a fever, everyone gets worried. It was so pitiful... He couldn't sleep well for a few nights and his temperature kept fluctuating. I wondered if he was missing you badly when he was sick.
I kept checking on him at night because I was worried about him. I pasted the cool patch on him although it kept peeling off, I wiped his whole body gently with damp cloth, hoping to be able to bring the temperature down and make him more comfortable, and I stroked his hair with water, occasionally stroking his scalp, like how you used to do when you lulled him to sleep when he was an infant. I tried to emulate the things that you used to do to comfort him.
La, I quietly whispered to you when I was by his side. Could you hear me? I asked if you would be able to visit him because he was sick. I don't know if you could... I knew God heard me but... I don't know if you were able to.
Whatever it is, I know that as his mum, you would want him to be well. You would want him to have a good, undisturbed night's sleep. You would want to do whatever you can to get him well. And I know God knows that too. I'm sure He heard your prayers from wherever you are.
Irfan is well now. I hope you are at ease to know that.
You just rest there in peace, ok, La? We'll take care of your kids for you.
I kept checking on him at night because I was worried about him. I pasted the cool patch on him although it kept peeling off, I wiped his whole body gently with damp cloth, hoping to be able to bring the temperature down and make him more comfortable, and I stroked his hair with water, occasionally stroking his scalp, like how you used to do when you lulled him to sleep when he was an infant. I tried to emulate the things that you used to do to comfort him.
La, I quietly whispered to you when I was by his side. Could you hear me? I asked if you would be able to visit him because he was sick. I don't know if you could... I knew God heard me but... I don't know if you were able to.
Whatever it is, I know that as his mum, you would want him to be well. You would want him to have a good, undisturbed night's sleep. You would want to do whatever you can to get him well. And I know God knows that too. I'm sure He heard your prayers from wherever you are.
Irfan is well now. I hope you are at ease to know that.
You just rest there in peace, ok, La? We'll take care of your kids for you.
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